Take a deep breath

Take a deep breath / In through your nose, and out through your mouth / Smell and taste and hear and just, feel it / Let the brisk air awaken you / Liven you

Smell the soil anchoring the tall trees around you to the Earth / The earth that keeps the Earth, Earth as we know it / That earth breathes you know? / A steady flow

The cycle continues as the ball called Earth with all the earth spins / It twirls like a small child in a pretty dress / Like the rough hand of a farmer / Caresses smooth cheeks and dirty feet

The air is made of billions of things / And in each breath you take here there’s some water / The tide, the flow, moving to and fro / I'm told we're mostly water, you know?

A light rain starts / It's cool but not cold / Your skin contracts yet you are relaxed / Take a deep breath / The cloth on you is wet, as are all of your hairs which are standing up straight

The wind is softly blowing / Softly speaking to the trees / Around you a symphony and cacophony of noises of voices / Of the waves of fresh water

Take a deep breath / You only have so many you know? / The steady drum the steady hum of the breath of Earth / Breathe, keep breathing

It has taken many breaths like this one / Well before you were born / And too, still, after you die it will continue / It will

This spot, this beautiful, wonderful place you've found / There are others like it and others who find them / But it's not yours or theirs and it's not about anyone in particular

The point is friend, you breathe / I breathe, and one day we'll both stop / But when we stop the others don't / The other people the other places

And so it's not about the places either / The places come and go, to and fro, in and exhalation / Here and in every nation / And ask every doctor the place is never the patient / It's just that sometimes we decided / That neither finding nor breathing / Is quite as good as reaping / While others slain and weeping / But the Earth, it keeps breathing

And even from the tops of the tallest towers / Where deep breathing takes a back-seat to far seeing / It's about the connections, our relationships / To the Earth, to the others, to the other places / Because to be stagnant is to be dead / But to be alive is to be finding and just keeping breathing


This poem is one which I wrote last March (2017) and it remains one of my favourites. I submitted it to a UNESCO contest for poetry on "Sustainable Tourism" and won in my category, though I don't think there were too many other entries. You can read all of the other writers' poems here. I wanted to put this on the site earlier — as I often read it at shows and people seem to really enjoy it but I was waiting for it to show up somewhere off-site, but that doesn't seem to have materialized beyond the link above so here it is. I also felt bad about not having a blog or something to post for the last and next little while due to a heavy workload at the moment. The magic of this little poem is in the reading I think, but maybe when I'm back in Canada again I'll record a reading. Broadly, it's about travel and climate change (recurring themes in my writing). Hope you enjoy. Let me know what you think. Poems come slower than blog posts but I'll continue to post them here.

"End of Man" - 04 A Collection of Imperfection Lyrics

The man looks down at his filthy hands / And he thinks to himself about what he’s become / Nothing spectacular he thinks to himself / Has come about in this life of mine

This beach / This beach is a curse / This beach / This beach is a curse / For better or worse / This beach / This beach is a curse / For better or worse

Wading, is what he decides he will do and he begins to traverse / The long white shore / As he walks, he walks West until his calves begin to burn / And he turns towards the waves and begins to walk again

This beach / This beach is a curse / This beach / This beach is a curse / For better or worse / This beach / This beach is a curse / For better or worse

The water begins to wash over him / As he makes his way into the inky black / There is a point, at which the cold water begins / To feel like silk there’s no light, no tunnel, no shadow, no darkness, just empty

This beach / This beach is a curse / This beach / This beach is a curse / For better or worse / This beach / This beach is a curse / For better or worse
 

A Collection of Imperfection available HERE.


Edit 2017.12.22: Forgot a "thinks."

"Stories" - 03 A Collection of Imperfection Lyrics

Curled under a blanket at night / It was not the heat that kept me warm / With feverish excitement, I’d plunge / To find that I have gills

I find that passion doesn’t last / Often to my own dismay / For that, I must thank my parents / Loving mom and dad

What a strange thought to think about / All that makes them unique / What a strange thought to think about / Everyone thinks

My mother is a raging sea on fire / Cannons quickly loaded, quip and query well researched / And the other hand my father / Logical, reasonable, and quiet

I used to think that I only took after her / Still more like her day by day / But it’s times like these I remember / My father’s in here, he’s just harder to find

What a strange thought to think about / All that makes them unique / What a strange thought to think about / Everyone thinks

We’re so beautifully alone / Yet we’re so tragically together / Who were you at twelve? / Who are you now? / What a novel this would make / What stories we could tell / Tales of adventure, heartache, and sorrow / Fiction with real life mixed in

His wife and kids died in a car crash / She fell in love with her best friend / He has an adorable rescue cat / She writes poetry about a dead uncle / He fought in a war / She stubbed her toe at work / He loves decorating cakes / She’s an ex-bodybuilder / He has a movie review blog / She’s a big vinyl fan / He wants to start to date men / She’s top of her class

A Collection of Imperfection available HERE.

"Barcode Tattoo" - 02 A Collection of Imperfection Lyrics

Oh my love yes I insist / Tattoo this barcode on my wrist / With it we can prove to me and to you for once and for all that I exist

You and I, we’ll set a mattress in front of the record player / You and I, we’ll take off all our clothes / And we’ll put on Radiohead and we’ll just lie there nearly dead / Naked and exposed

Oh my love yes I insist / Tattoo this barcode on my wrist / With it we can prove to me and to you for once and for all that I exist
Oh my love yes I insist / Tattoo this barcode on my wrist / With it we can prove to me and to you for once and for all that I exist

For hours we can lose ourselves / Just staring at the ceiling and holding hands / I promise that I’ll only get up to restart the album / Or if need be I’ll get us more tea

Oh my love yes I insist / Tattoo this barcode on my wrist / With it we can prove to me and to you for once and for all that I exist
Oh my love yes I insist / Tattoo this barcode on my wrist / With it we can prove to me and to you for once and for all that I exist

Feel the planet as it spins / Global warming kicks us all in the shins / But for this moment / Nothing but you and I matters anyways 

Oh my love yes I insist / Tattoo this barcode on my wrist / With it we can prove to me and to you for once and for all that I exist
Oh my love yes I insist / Tattoo this barcode on my wrist / With it we can prove to me and to you for once and for all that I exist
Oh my love yes I exist
 

A Collection of Imperfection available HERE.

"Cooperate" - 01 A Collection of Imperfection Lyrics

Pen the poem as it appears on the page / Stare awestruck at the blazing stars / You can never escape, but you can see this tiny sliver of our galaxy

How presumptuous we are / To even think to call this ours / Can you even imagine what the hell must be just out of our reach?

How can you expect me to just sit here quietly / When there’s a whole Universe inside my head and we all know there’s at least one more outside of it? / But still, you keep me caged / Ask me the same questions every day / But I will not, no / I will not cooperate / I will not cooperate / I will not cooperate

How long does our kind last? / When do the stars collapse? / If you die then you are nothing / And soon will be the day when at last you are forgotten

The Sun engulfs the Earth / And everything is scorched / Billions of years of history long since passed / Nothing left, nothing left, nothing left

And after all that / After the Sun explodes / Everything that once was is dark and cold / The timing is irrelevant when time stops / And the Universe dies

How can you expect me to just sit here quietly / When there’s a whole Universe inside my head and we all know there’s at least one more outside of it? / But still, you keep me caged / Ask me the same fucking questions every day / But I will not, no / I will not cooperate / I will not cooperate / I will not cooperate

 

A Collection of Imperfection available HERE.

Verse, poetry, smoking opium, and a self-centered train of thought that spirals downwards

How does one write? / Should one make a proclamation / A declaration of presence, wisdom, or of some other thing? / Or should they stay modest and reveal knowledge through a process / Must there be knowledge?
 
What does it mean to write something down? / Many would suggest that it is to create / Or to tell / Or to lie / Or to remove oneself and one's readers from the truth / I’ll admit that I am lost
 
Adrift in a sea of my own ideas and more so of my own words and others’ / Sometimes when I make, when I create, I step away from the brain I understand as me / From the artist’s idol hands and intellect and self-awareness, and I’ll just write
 
I believe this process is called free writing, but I think that by / Separating these lines / Into lines divided by / Slashes on a digital page this is poetry and not prose / Or at least, I suppose, this is verse
 
Does this make me a poet? / The Romantics tell me no / I shall not be so bold as to attempt to make an announcement on the state of poetry, about poetry, or to define any such things / I am not as bold as the Romantics
 
But I look inwards like they do I suppose, probably not as deep, and with less ability and skill and intelligence / This line has successfully put me among the greats, as the greats put themselves among the other greats with similar but better lines / It’s a rhetorical trick, this whole thing
 
But again, I am just writing things down / Or more so I am typing things down / Or up, as the monitor is above the keyboard / How, I wonder, does typing verse differ from writing it? / I have certainly done both, but I’ve never finished a written poem, digital ones are much easier to finish
 
If I start smoking opium now can I catch Coleridge and be a digital romantic? 
 
There it is! / The observation buried within this “poem” / Have I then buried the lede or is that the point? / More probably there is no point / It has been too long since I’ve written anything like this / I wonder if by free writing I am posing as a poet without themes in mind or if this is just what poets do
 
If this ends up as anything worth rereading I will certainly revise / Is that then poetry? / I think poetry is an act of narcissism / I want to be heard yes, but more than that I want to speak and to make things of my own volition / Do I write like this because I fear writing works that can be wrong? / Such as political pieces or the like?
 
Am I a versifying journalist? / Who knows, probably, and hopefully, if anyone ever reads this, or has it read to them, they will be able to tell me / But again, this is the internet now, so please if you see this, and it has become very popular — albeit I doubt it — / Please don’t Tweet me, the notifications will surely distract me too much to write anything else
 
The end. Now to find those themes.
 

"Dishfish, man" Lyrics

Well, I’m standing in the kitchen / And I’m staring at my cell phone / Because i’ve been waiting for a notification, for some validation, for over an hour now

And when I go back to the task at hand / And I look back down in the sink again / And this has happened once before, this has happened once before / I saw a fish swimming in the dish water

I only stop drinking coffee / When I start drinking wine /Because time is an illusion / And all my life is deconstruction, demolition, demolition, demolition, deconstruction

So, I asked the dishfish, / What the hell he was doing just swimming in my kitchen

And the fish said / “Nah man, this is something that you’re doing to yourself / How many times does a talking fish have to tell you to get help? / Too many times, too many times, too many times, too many times

I only stop drinking coffee / When I start drinking wine /Because time is an illusion / And all my life is deconstruction, demolition, demolition, demolition, deconstruction

And then the fish grew man legs / Man arms, a man's face / And he got really aggressive / And I got overly defensive again
Talking fish always get me like that, man.

On Bandcamp HERE.

For some thoughts on the lyrics see the previous post.

Introduction to Writing (Other) and Some Thoughts "Dishfish, man"

This section will be similar to the “Blog / Nonfiction Writing” section, but instead it will be writing which doesn’t fall into that category. At the moment that means it will likely be lyrics and other poetry, but some fiction work and other pieces might show up here in the future. 

To start, I will introduce “Dishfish, man”, the song I released today and which is my first solo release. I like to leave lots of the lyrics up to open interpretation, especially given that the author isn’t the transcendental signified anyways, but I thought I’d let you in on a couple of things.

The first two lines are the real premise under which I thought of basically the entire song. I was doing dishes, standing in the kitchen, staring at my phone and waiting for any kind of digital validation to briefly stave off a brief but brutal bout of depression and loneliness. When eventually, I looked back at the dishes I had an image of, while I was distracted by my phone, a somewhat revolting freshwater fish making its way into the sink with all of the dishes. Extraordinarily luckily for me, ‘fish’ and ‘dish’ rhyme, so I had a poem nearly ready to go. Then the story came to me of a Dr. Seuss-like fish talking and becoming a man, etc. There are metaphors and imagery in there for lots of things, but all of that is for the listener to uncover (and feel free to tell me what you think I might give you some of my input too if you care to hear it).

The video clip of the lyrics in a notebook which starts off the music video is what I wrote in the moment taking a much-needed break from introspective dishwashing. 

I will put the full lyrics to the song in the post following this one, as I think will be my structure from here on out. 

Dishfish, man Artwork

You can find the song on Bandcamp HERE.

"My Morning" - 07 Emission Amplification - The Polar Bear is Mine Lyrics

You make a chrysalis, 
Like an unlucky caterpillar that will grow to be an ugly moth, 
Dead to the world, 
You’re doomed by the light. 

You feel wet to the touch, 
Just like a newborn slut, 
To this world that will, 
Eat you alive anyway. 

When you emerge from your cocoon, 
Like a black insect, 
Covered in oil and gold, 
The only two things that matter. 

You feel wet to the touch, 
Just like a newborn slut, 
To this world that will, 
Eat you alive anyway. 

You feel wet to the touch, 
Just like an unborn slut, 
To this world that will, 
Eat you alive in the end. 

You feel wet to the touch, 
Just like a newborn slut, 
To this world that will, 
Eat you alive anyway.

Emission Amplification available HERE.

"Red" - 06 Emission Amplification - The Polar Bear is Mine Lyrics

 I don’t think you hate like I do, 
I don’t think you hear what I hear, 
I know you can’t fuck like I can, 
I know you can’t dance at all. 

The vine grows red, 
Wraps ‘round your neck, 
It hurts doesn't it? 
The vine grows red, 
Wraps ‘round your neck, 
It hurts doesn't it? 

I know you need the bees to pollinate your flowers, 
But when they sting you’re incarnadine, 
I know it’s hard to waltz under pressure, 
I know you can’t dance at all. 

The vine grows red, 
Wraps ‘round your neck, 
It hurts doesn't it? 
The vine grows red, 
Wraps ‘round your neck, 
It hurts doesn't it? 

I don’t think you hate like I hate, 
I don’t think you feel what I feel, 
I know you can’t fuck like I fuck, 
I know you can’t dance at all! 

Emission Amplification available HERE.

"Ice" - 05 Emission Amplification - The Polar Bear is Mine Lyrics

I've been here for a million years, 
I've been here since I can remember, 
I've been locked inside my cell, 
I've been locked inside this chamber. 

I've been drowning in ice, 
I've been drowning in ice, 
It's not very nice, 
When you drown me in ice! 

My knuckles are cracked, 
My lips are broken, 
My heart beats slow, 
And my head is numb yeah. 

I've been drowning in ice, 
I've been drowning in ice, 
It's not very nice, 
When you drown me in ice! 

It is so damn cold, 
It's fucking cold as hell here, 
My heart beats slow, 
And my head is numb yeah. 

I've been drowning in ice, 
I've been drowning in ice, 
It's not very nice, 
When you drown me in ice, 

I'm drowning in, 
Yes I'm drowning in, 
I'm drowning in ice, 
I'm drowning in, 
Yes I'm drowning in, 
It’s not very nice. 

Emission Amplification available HERE.

"Dreams Are Nightmares" - 04 Emission Amplification - The Polar Bear is Mine Lyrics

This song is written by DJ Maki and not myself but are here for posterity. 

We saw the cold, 
Coming into the night. 
We saw her dark, 
Bright blue eyes. 
We saw the girl, 
That took your life, took your life. 

Dreams are nightmares, 
From yesterday, they won't go away, 
Dreams are nightmares, 
They won't go away, fears of yesterday. 
Dreams are nightmares, 
From yesterday, they won't go away, 
Dreams are nightmares, 
They won't go away, fears of yesterday. 

Forgotten and left behind, 
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. 
Now you're mine, 
Dark blue eyes, 
So beautiful, oh so beautiful, 
Escape me, escape myself, 
Save a life, just this time. 

Dreams are nightmares, 
From yesterday, they won't go away, 
Dreams are nightmares, 
They won't go away, fears of yesterday, 
Dreams are nightmares, 
From yesterday, they won't go away, 
Dreams are nightmares, 
They won't go away, fears of yesterday. 

Dreams and nightmares, 
So beautiful, oh so beautiful, 
Dreams are nightmares, 
So beautiful, beautiful.

Emission Amplification available HERE.

"Armageddon" - 03 Emission Amplification - The Polar Bear is Mine Lyrics

This is the end, 
There will be, 
No today, no tomorrow, no yesterday. 

Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing, 
Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing. 

No brimstone, 
No fire, 
No God from heaven, 
No devil from hell. 

Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing, 
Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing. 

It's all gone, 
There is nothing left, 
And when I look around, 
I don't see a heaven. 

Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing, 
Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing. 

You lied to me, 
You told me, 
There would be something, 
But there's nothing. 

Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing, 
Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing. 

Nothing matters now, 
Not who you were, 
Not who you've been, 
And it's not beautiful, 
It's not ugly, 
It is simply itself. 

Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing, 
Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing, 
Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing, 
Welcome to Armageddon, 
Welcome to nothing. 

Emission Amplification available HERE.

"Dirty Song" - 02 Emission Amplification - The Polar Bear is Mine Lyrics

That perfect body, 
You make me sweat, 
Come back to me, 
I'm not done yet. 
I'm up the wall, 
You're on the bed, 
You're so filthy, 
Get out of my head. 

You're not easy, 
But I work hard, 
I knew I wanted you, 
Right from the start, 
You're so crazy, 
You choke me out, 
And with those eyes, 
I never doubt. 

That pale body, 
That I make red, 
I grab your face, 
She spits in mine, 
She bites my neck, 
And draws some blood, 
He kisses my cheek, 
And whispers. 

You're not easy, 
But I work hard, 
I knew I wanted you, 
Right from the start, 
You're so crazy, 
You choke me out, 
And with those eyes, 
I never doubt. 

Rake me with nails, 
And break my back, 
You're killing me, 
But I want more. 
Oh I want more. 
Yeah I want more. 

Emission Amplification available HERE.

"My Morning" - 01 Emission Amplification - The Polar Bear is Mine Lyrics

I woke up today, 
Sun won't shine today, 
It has gone away, 
Go back to sleep again. 
When I wake up later I, 
Climb in my coffin and I, 
Drive my hearse away. 

I have a slim figure, 
No skin, just bone, 
Skeleton fingers, no eyes, no nose, 
I'm dead. 

I don't know how I died, 
But I know it happened, 
I don't know when I died, 
But I know it happened, 
I feel alive now, 
I've come back now , 
I've been resurrected now, 
And I am living dead now. 

There's maggots in my brain, 
There's crows at my eyes, 
I once was dead but, 
Now I'm alive. 

I don't know how I died, 
But I know it happened, 
I don't know when I died, 
But I know it happened, 
I feel alive now, 
I've come back now, 
I've been resurrected now, 
And I am living dead now! 

Emission Amplification available HERE.